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The idea for this blog came from a book written by one of my absolute favorite authors, Nora Roberts. The book is titled "The Awakening".  The book lit a fire inside of me, it opened up something I didn't know truly existed.  I couldn't put it down and found a part 2, which was equally as riveting. I will admit, that having to wait until right before thanksgiving for book 3 is driving me a bit nuts, to the point that I read the books again.  The series is about a young girl who was forced by her mother to live a safe life and the life that she wanted her to have. This girl's life was laid out for what she was supposed to do every minute of every day. I related to this a little, not that I grew up like this, in fact my childhood was the exact opposite, but some of my jobs and bosses did this, so I related. Then the girl found documents in her mother's house about money her father has sent her that was in an investment account, and it changed her life. I myself did not find money (I wish! Lol), but how her gay best friend helped to push her to use some of the money to have fun and to take the time for find herself, that part is what I truly started to relate too. Her journey took her to Ireland in search of her father (who she later found out was deceased), and her gay best friend who accompanied her on this trip convinced her to start a daily blog to document her trip and her journey to finding herself. She loved to write, and I realized that so did I. I was called the grammar nazi at work and always asked to rewrite memos or emails; I didn’t mind doing it because it came easy to me. So, I decided to give it a try, but; I was hesitant and anxious about it, and I had no idea where to start.


The more into the book I got, the more captivated I became. I mentioned it to my counselor during one of our sessions and she thought it might be a good way for me to really express myself and what I was feeling in order to heal more.  That weekend I started researching how to get one started and took the leap. I titled it "How Do You Cope", "The Act of Coping in Everyday Life".  My original intent was sharing my experiences and how I would cope with it in hopes that it would help someone else. Instead, I am sharing more than I ever thought I could with the world to let you know that you are not alone, that what you feel, every day, is validated, that you are not a burden, that your feelings matter, that you matter.


Over the years I have formed bonds with some of my Soldiers that go beyond the normal "bond of brotherhood".  Sharing experiences, even traumas has been the best way for me to cope and heal, and the amazing bonds I've formed with current and former Service Members is because of shared experiences. We helped each other cope, we've been rocks and outlets, ranting and crying shoulders, whatever we needed to be to be there for each other we were, and we have all grown so much from it. That also helped me realize that doing this blog might be the best thing for me, that not only would I be able to cope better and heal more, but that I might be able to reach more people and offer them the same type of hope. I looked back and realized that when I started advocating and standing up for Sexual Harassment and Assault Prevention (SHARP) survivors and sharing my own experiences, it helped me, to share those traumas with others, standing up for them and fighting for them. I wanted to desperately continue that, and my hope is that I can continue to do that (in a way) with this blog.


When my gay best friend told me that my Friendship Blog touched him and captivated him, that is when I knew I could do more. He said my way with words pulled him in and the way I wrote that blog was beautiful (even though it was a tough one to write).  He gave me the confidence boost I needed.


I am so grateful for everyone who has and is supporting me on this new and exciting and terrifying journey. I hope that when you read my blog, you are able to cope and heal so that you can become the person you are meant to be.

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